In order to build a house I think the key requirement is that you have to actually WANT to do it. Its not something you can just "wing" as I'm clearly finding out. See if you WANT to build a house chances are you have been thinking about it for a while, you have an understanding of what you desire and at least some words to communicate your wants with someone in the building industry.
You also have to CARE a lot. Its possible to fake the WANT by copying someone elses ideas but its not possible to fake caring. I've have had multiple discussions with people about building recently, one particular conversation lasted about 30 mins and the entire point of the discussion was that the lady thought it was wrong to team a round tap with a square basin. I have no idea how I managed to get into such a discussion but while not giving a rats about basins and taps I was completely in awe of the passion she felt towards such things. She had put in so much thought and cared so much and she wasn't even building.
So many people it seems have a dream house in their head. It may not be an entire house but pretty much everyone I know has "something" that they particularly want or like. I get told that its "exciting" that I'm building, that I'm "lucky" to be able to do it "my way" and I just find the entire concept frightening.
I think part of it begins where I am in 3 different mindsets when it comes to these sorts of decisions.
First off is the "accountant" in me. This is the mindset that points out this is a house and that its important not to overcapitalise, to build for quality not wow and that its basically just 4 walls and to get over myself.
The second mindset argues that its not a house its a "home" and this is the one opportunity in my life to develop an enviroment specific to my needs, desires and wants. This personality seems to like spa baths, window seats and walk in pantrys a lot.
Finally I am still half child and some things are just cool. Vacpans fall under the spell of the inner child, as do laundry chutes and the ultimate child want in life - a secret passage !!! Yup I know it sounds totally stupid but serious HOW COOL WOULD ONE BE.
So - 3 personalities and not one any use for chosing splashbacks....
I think building would be a lot easier if I didn't just like everything. The helpful comments I get from loved ones is "just build what you like". This is part of the problem coz I like everything !. Sure my dream house would be in the style of hogwarts (see above reference to childlike tendencies) but I would be quite happy in a californian bungalow, a tudor mansion, a 3 bedroom art deco or a 70's brick veneer with a lovely hydranga around the side.
The main fear is getting it all wrong. Yes yes I know that with building there is no right and wrong - but there is coz what if I don't like it at the end ?. Most people spend years dreaming up their perfect house - I'm winging it all and doing it in the style of clueless. A house is a collection of thousands of decisions, from room sizes, materials, layout, colours, styles, products, finishes etc. What are the key ones I have to get right ?. The usual logic of putting things I like together is a bit floored. I like chocolate, salt and vinegar chips and roast beef. Individually they all taste lovely but blend them all together in a blender and you'd have to pay me to eat it. Is building a house the same ?.
I have a whole pile of clothes in my wardrobe that fit into the "seemed a good idea at the time" pile. What if I make the same stupid mistakes with building a house ?. Its one thing to buy a white lace jacket and never wear it but who wants to spend hundreds of thousands on a house and think aka Pauline Hanson "I don't like it".